I’m going to boldly step up and declare that when three out of four children are boys, the meaning of the simple phrase, “raising a family” can’t be contained in an ordinary three dimensional object.
“Dad, we did some research and we want to build a live trap to catch quail.” So, I parked the push mower and we fashioned a circle of hail screen into a dome shape. Then we cut another circle for the floor and braded it onto the dome. The floor piece had a 10” diameter hole cut out of dead center. We carried this structure into the woods, dug an inverted igloo shaped entrance (A ditch) into the ground long enough and deep enough so quail could follow the trail of grain in the ditch, making their way under the floor to the center hole and then jump up into the trap. The theory was that these pretty little birds aren’t smart enough to use that same entrance as an exit but instead, they will continuously race around just inside the outside edge of the dome to try to find an escape.
“Dad, that’s going to work, I can’t wait to see how many quail we’ll catch by tomorrow morning!”
How do you tell them not to build their hopes up too high without just plain saying, “Don’t build your hopes up too high.”
The next morning, low and behold, there were three quail racing around just inside the outside edge of the dome shaped hail screen and three excited boys dancing with joy just outside the outside edge of the dome shape of that same structure, “The Quail Trap!”. We took our catch home, fed and watered them, then that afternoon we gave back their freedom. We had proved to the whole world that we knew what we were doing!
High School age.
“Dad, we need a real project to work on.”
“Ok, here’s $500.00 go find an old pickup truck, bring it home, overhaul and restore it so it’s usable.”
They bought a completely faded out red junker for $15.00, towed it home and the very first necessity item they bought for it was an Aoooogaaah horn. This project was invaluable as a learning device. The motor had to be completely dismantled once and removed from the old pickup truck twice because when they had gotten it all put together the first time the input transmission shaft adapter spacer was still lying on the workbench. I don’t recall exactly but, I’m going to say that Including all the body building putty and the home squirted paint job, they had a pretty decent looking knock about that cost them somewhere around $478.54, a cheap price for the wealth of experience that they stored and are proportioning out while raising their own families today. Oh yes, there is one physical part remaining from that project. The almighty Aoooogaaah horn, in good working condition, is lying on a shelf in the garage!
While reminiscing a few years ago, one of the boys said, ”I’ll never forget how calm your voice was when you said ‘boys, the engine will have to come back out.”
I guess I hadn’t realized the depth of penetration my calm voice had carried in a very stormy atmosphere. I must have said it with the same emotion as I would have said, “don’t forget to shut the door on your way through this experience.” I really believe the door is still open.

My shoe spoon has grown a wart
Which cuts it’s usage short
My boot doesn’t slide
‘Cause my sock’s hung inside
Makes me want to just sit here and snort!

Even with an extra jerk
My shoe spoon simply will not work
My boot gets a good start
But that soon falls apart
When it bumps into this unusual quirk

Settling for two naked feet
Sounds adequately incomplete
When I go outside
The turf feeds on my hide
A favor I don’t care to repeat

My options seem varied and few
I really don’t know what else to do
I might have to handle
Wearing my sandals
Which cause my toes to turn blue!

We live in an area that was developed by villiagers in ages past. There are approximately 15 families living within three lineal miles, with us living in the middle. Every Friday eveninig I would crank up our haying equipment and drop about two acres of alfalfa. Of course that routine was much too often to use the patch for feed, it looked more like a lawn so I used it for seed. I planted four bags of sand, with the tied end tucked underneath, in exactly the same location every week. Ta Da! An instant ball diamond. Every Saturday afternoon neighborhood kids would start arriving. They'd walk over, ride their bikes over or coax Mom or Dad to drop them off. Teams would form according to arrival sequence and if you lived in the neighborhood, no matter what size or age you were. you were invited to knock the stuffing out of the softball and personally kick the tires on each and every sandbag on your scenic trip around the alfalfa patch. We'd serve light refreshments after each vigorous workout then, we'd close the season with parents vs kids day. These parents were smart because the kids would always win. Then we'd all enjoy a niegborhood chat blended into a sparkling wiener roast!
Yes, there were many seeds sown.
1 - Teamwork is more important than the final score.
2 - Age can be a mixed kettle of fish and still provide a ton of enjoyment.
It was my home court so, I was the umpire, The King of Alfalfa! The one seed I planted that I remember most vividly is that, "one has to accept the fact that they aren't always in control and learn to be happy with that." Here's the incident. A cute, red haired, freckle faced alfalfa trampler boldly asked me "Mr. Schrag, how do you know if it's a ball or a strike?" I just as boldly answered, "Tommy, the pitched ball isn't anything until I name it" He smiled and grabbed up a bat!

When Comedians graze on open range
Their "funny" food seems a little bit strange
They'll smash a man's caricature or steal a man's pride
Then wait for applause, while enjoying the ride

A man will get hurt in a most unusuall way
This gives our comedians something brand new to say
Or a man and his wife get into a small spat
You can bet your last penny we will hear about that

When they use those descriptives that are right on the edge
it's like trying to move gutter jokes with a thousand pound sledge
I know the "not funny" problem's in my own mind
But, stand alone humor is real hard to find

When comedians take advantage of other poor folks
It screws up my whole system like eating sick jokes
They might have the handle to the right cup of tea
But, if you expect a burst of laughter, don't look at me!

They'll do a staged brawl with people knocked to the floor
Or yell at each other to try to settle a score
Or do a blood squirt that's meant to be funny
It looks like someone's lifeline escaping and runny

For me, humor thrives with THINGS disguised in surprise
An "out of the ordinary" brings the audience alive
When revealing a truth of things most unexpected
Smiles begin to appear where smiles once were neglected

So, let's stay away from these human attacks
and throw in some surprises where character lacks
Then the truth will rise up for all folk to see
that thriving on faults is cheap comedy!

Alert Privot Eye Detective, Mr. B. Fore, penetrates undercover, revealing rare find!
"I have Iced my conclusion, this motorized vehicle has just recently transfered ownership to a new agent"